04.23.09 
Culture, Facts, Observations, Politics, Punk Blog Rebellion 3 comments
Scientists, according to The Sun, have finally realized the global menace that fatties are: “the increase in big-eaters means more food production—a major cause of CO2 gas emissions warming the planet.” Ah, ha! The obese are responsible for global warming. I knew it.
With further expertise on the subject Dr Phil Edwards, of the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, said: “Moving about in a heavy body is like driving in a gas guzzler.” On top of that, these chunky-monkeys actually drive gas guzzlers in order to, as Tye Pennington would say if he hosted The Biggest Looser, “MOVE THAT ASS.”
What, you think they’ll fit into a Honda Fit?
How awful, reprehensive, and evil—these meaty mates should be punished for their crimes against humanity and mother earth!
In my recent post, Tax the Flatulent Humans Not the Cheddar Cutting Cows, I encouraged politicians to do a “one-cheek-sneak and impose a tax on” people given to “frequent spreading of their colon-cologne.” These people are, inevitably, excessive consumers of food. These tubby trains should pay for their porky persistence.
To rid the world of this chunky cargo, the big and beautiful must pay, they must pay their full-figured mass in a hefty tax. A tax that forces the pack of franks from their neck into the government’s corpulent coffers.
11.01.07 Observations, Punk Blog Rebellion 6 comments
Who doesn’t love cats? Their so soft and so cute and so cuddly.
According to Technorati there are 6,209 blogs related to cats. A Google Blog search returns 339,007 results for posts that contain the word “cats”. Out of my shear infatuation for cats, I did go through the first thousand blogs from Technorati and only made it to ninety-eight thousand of the blog entries found in Google. But alas I could make it no further, my heart just swelled to an abnormal size in an outpouring of affection for these precious felines and I had to obtain some heart medicine to reduce the swelling. I do, after my recover, hope to return to the endless pursuit of pictures, stories, games, and fun with cats that can be found in the blogosphere. Until then enjoy this list:
The worst best cat blogs:
- LOL Cats - This blog will make you laugh and laugh and laugh. I’m laughing already because it has LOL in the title.
- Stuff On My Cats - This is a fabulous blog devoted to putting things on cats, taking a picture, and posting it.
- Cats Are Crazy - Wacky, Wacky stuff here… you know cats they are just so crazy. This site chronicles the craziness of cats.
- Dead Cat Bounce - Ah, my personal favorite. Yea I know it’s a financial term used to describe the rise and sudden fall of a stock, but it references a “dead cat” and a “bounce”… the thought outside of finances
just thrills worries me (illustrated with the above image).
10.23.07 Observations, Punk Blog Rebellion 1 comment
A simple search in Google’s Blog search reveals over 99,000 results for the phrase “Things About Myself”.
In response to the p l e t h o r a of bloggers who have posted the proverbial: “… Things About Myself That …” and all its desultory variations, I give you this post. The blog rebellion has begun.
Feel free to add to this list or create your own.
Four Things You Already Know About Yourself that I Find Lame:
- You Talk (Unless, of course, you are a mute or an infant)
- You like, support, or watch “reality” TV (like 99% of Americans)
- You Exist (”I love mankind - it’s people I can’t stand.” — Charles M. Schulz, Go Fly a Kite, Charlie Brown)
- You Read This Post
