Swine Flu is Better Than Sliced Bread

11.20.09 Culture, Observations no comments

Just as every dog must have its day, every pig must have its virus. Hogs, since the dawn of civilization (at least societies that could write), have acquired a bad rap: first the ancient hebrews declared them unclean, then the hebrews wouldn’t throw pearls at them (i.e., “don’t throw pearls to swine”), then western society breeds them for bacon, then (ironically) anyone who eats excessively in western society bears the species’ name in a derogatory fashion (i.e., “you’re a pig”), then they get a virus named after them (i.e., the swine flu). Pigs have quite the history in the human psyche. When will pigs catch a break? Oh, when the fat lady sings? Or hell freezes over?

What did the porkers do to deserve such a reputation? I mean, have you ever seen an angry pig, a sad pig, or a pig doing anything to cause you harm? I think not. Now, all of a sudden they have this virus pinned on them. This horrible virus that will destroy life as we know it!

Of course we, western humans, love to be entertained. It wasn’t as if the machine that sliced bread did anything in particular to warrant our enamorment with the product. Swine flu is the best entertainment since sliced bread. Are you not amused?